"Chinatown"-Official media of Chinese Australians

Love of face and comparison has become a common character description for Chinese by foreign friends.

Get married sooner or later, give birth to children, how much salary you earn every month, and the quality of life


Can't you really live without comparison?

Comparing love is a manifestation of unconfidence and insecurity, and a mental paleness after material wealth. The old saying "safe and happy" means: be content with poverty and take pleasure in adhering to one's beliefs. He also talked about "satisfaction and happiness", which means: if you don't blindly compare with others, you will be at ease. Now, this good character has obviously gradually broken with the rapid development of society.

As the pace of people's lives is accelerating, competition is becoming increasingly fierce. With the rapid progress of science and technology, knowledge is also increasing explosively. "Spare time make-up lessons" has become a daily arrangement for most parents for their children.

Many domestic children often study until 11pm at night, and they are overwhelmed by countless cram schools on weekends. And foreign children cannot escape the clutches of Chinese parents. Chinese schools and painting classes also take up most of the children's time.

This is nothing more than the most direct manifestation of parents who do not want their children to "lag behind" among their peers. It also directly reflects the phenomenon of "becoming children" during the holidays: "Come on, recite a poem to uncles and aunts", "Come on, dance for grandparents"...Have you ever asked your children if they want it? Do you know that pulling out seedlings to promote growth can cause a child's personality deformity? No wonder many people lamented after many years: the most talented time should be in kindergarten.

In addition to raising children, the Chinese also like to be better than themselves. It's just that different from high-profile show off to children, most Chinese people have better learned to wear masks to hide. Seeing other people reading books you can’t understand and listening to music you can’t understand, you sneer and think that you must be pretending to be forced; when you see a friend driving a good car and buying luxury goods that you can’t afford, you want to be Because there is a rich partner or rich parents.

From the house, the car, the morning and evening of marriage, the quality of work, and the level of social status, everyone is too dependent on gaining self-confidence from comparisons, but they do not realize that such self-confidence is cheap and fragile. The folk saying goes: There are people outside of people, and mountains outside of mountains. It can be seen that the self-confidence gained from mutual comparison will definitely be lost in mutual comparison.

And the sense of security in life should be obtained from the depths of my heart. It comes from the accumulation and mastery of different kinds of knowledge, the understanding and discovery of the true meaning of life, and the exploration and transcendence in the process of growing up.

If you have to compare, then only compare with yourself!

Because this is the only source of "sustainability" confidence.

Article reprinted from Adelaide Today

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